my husband does not look like a gecko!! you are wrong, that was low.
okay, so he's not really my husband???? i just call him that because i wish he was
and he does
look like a gecko
don't you know? he has? the most beautiful and frightening brown eyes?
and i want to feed him marshmallows until we die
and no one will cry because clearly it was destiny to try
and feed delicious treats to a man who does not remotely resemble a reptile, how could you?!?!?!?!
and next time you have a crush, i'll recall the time that we were drunk
sipping cider and showing you my phone and a picture of his face
will tell me all about your latest love
and of course i will tell you that they look
a snake probably or maybe a newt or a frog or a toad
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